SOCCER HOOLIGAN OR SOUSED GERBIL? Warning… DO NOT call him a gerbil! Tushingham would think nothing of chewing off your foot at the ankle and beating you repeatedly over the head with it. A fast-livin', rock n' rollin', hard-drinkin' punk hamster with a bitter disposition, Tushingham is the ultimate slam-dancing, foul mouthed, brawling lout from the "other side of the pond". Sporting a tattoo of a hamster wheel on his "punchin' arm to remind him of how "the man" has kept his people "running in circles all these years", Tushingham and his special brand of rodent rage are always just seconds away from erupting at a tavern near you!

Fun Fact: Tushingham was once arrested for kidnapping after he was found passed out behind the wheel of a '68 Chevy Impala with 162 empty bottles of Iron City beer and Rolling Stones lead guitarist Keith Richards asleep in the car's trunk. Charges were dropped after Mr. Richards, who had been missing for 87 hours, was unable to put together a coherent sentence after repeated attempts by local police to find out what had happened.

What others say about Tushingham:

Lil' Pengy - "hello."

Stan the Man - "I NEVER said Tushingham owed me any money. And even if he did... it would be perfectly all right for him to keep it."

Terrance (The Badger) Kapunsky - "Tushy is a fine little bugger. He's a might wacky in the head, but he means well. I don't know if you'd find a finer man with as lengthy an arrest sheet as Tushy. That's why I have faith in him.

Leonard (the Mole) Stepponnmeisser - "Tushingham is very frightening, and he scares me too. Most things scare me actually, like fluoride and those really big street sweepers you only see at around 4:30 am. I mean why are they never seen at any other time? Have you ever seen one except at dawn? I am also very scared by those crazy people who call your house at all hours of the night asking you to switch your long distance, when it is obviously impossible to truly switch long distance, because time and space are based on the immutable laws of physics. I have books that would refute these incorrect 'long distance' concepts, but these salespeople never hold on long enough for me to fetch my glasses and anyway…not even those people frighten me nearly as much as Mr. Tushingham. One time I saw him eat glass and claim it was an appetizer. He was asking for dipping sauce. Some people might consider that odd."

Turk (the Naked Turtle) Tackleburry - "Is Tushingham nearby?? I have a VERY important appointment. Sorry, gotta go".